Sex and Free Expression
Sol takes a look at recent events at the University of Wisconsin-La Crosse and what they tell us about why it’s so important understand ourselves and be true to ourselves
University of Wisconsin-La Crosse Chancellor Joe Gow was recently fired for making pornographic content with his wife. As reported in The Daily Beast, Gow, the longest serving chancellor in the Wisconsin state system, was terminated amid a flurry of moral outrage. Jay Rothman, the President of the University of Wisconsin System, called Gow’s activities ‘abhorrent’ and said “Dr. Gow has subjected the university to significant reputational harm.”
The board of regents voted unanimously to fire Dr Gow, and UW System Board of Regents President Karen Walsh said they were “alarmed and disgusted” by his actions, which she said were “wholly and undeniably inconsistent with his role as chancellor.”
Ironically, Jay Rothman spearheaded a campaign on free speech and free expression in the University of Wisconsin System earlier this year. As reported by The Cap Times, when he announced the results of a large survey which showed many UW students were afraid to express themselves, Rothman said, “We can't be afraid of the truth and what the survey shows us, we want to make sure we get ourselves better. It is important that our universities continue to be marketplaces of ideas where divergent opinions can be shared and debated and discussed.”
Rothman went on to say, “We have to acknowledge that some students at our universities simply don’t feel comfortable sharing their views in class or elsewhere on campus. We need to create a culture that more openly values free expression — and make sure students understand their rights under the First Amendment.”
Unsurprisingly, here at TSG, we believe sex is an extremely important element of free expression. We are most ourselves in those moments of just before and after climax, when we’re free of inhibition and conscious thought. There’s a reason Freud and many other psychoanalysts thought sex and sexual relationships are key to who we are. Think carefully about your own sex life, your wants and desires, and what they say about who you are as a person. True sexual identity can often reveal interesting things about our day-to-day identity and our relationship with the world.
Dr Gow and his wife, Carmen Wilson, produce vegan cooking videos, which can be found at their YouTube channel @SexyHappyCouple. The videos feature adult stars and act as a warm-up to explicit content that can be found on the couple’s pornographic channels. I haven’t watched the more explicit content, but the cooking videos show a warm couple who care about the planet and enjoy sexual adventure.
In contrast, the members of the board of regents seem quite repressed. Outside of non-consensual or criminal activities, I can’t imagine describing someone else’s sexual choices as abhorrent or disgusting when they involve consenting adults. Moral outrage and indignation have been used as a tool to suppress unconventional thinking and behavior for thousands of years.
If Carmen and Joe are clear about the nature of the content they make – which they are – who bears the responsibility of ‘protecting’ people from the supposed harms of that content? Surely the viewer? It is up to Carmen and Joe whether they want to expose themselves in such intimate ways, but once they’ve made that decision, who has the right to criticize them? We can choose not to watch their videos, we can say we wouldn’t do what they’re doing, but appealing to authority or some moral code is exactly how the LGBTQ community has been repressed and persecuted for centuries.
Dr Gow, who is 63, had already announced his retirement. Students talk about Dr Gow riding a skateboard around campus and high-fiving people on his way. They talk about the care and concern he showed, and that his track record as the longest-serving chancellor meant he had to be doing something right. Current and former students and staff have come out in support of Dr Gow, highlighting that the firing doesn’t sit with the university’s commitment to the First Amendment and a well-publicized commitment to free speech and free expression.
Imagine being a gay or bi or non-binary student on campus, or someone who has done exactly the same things Carmen and Joe do in their videos. Imagine hearing that your board of regents - authority figures at your institution consider certain proclivities to be disgusting and abhorrent. How would that make you feel as a student?
I’ve written previously about the bravery and advocacy of the LGBTQ+ movement to overcome social prejudice and secure the freedom to be themselves in many countries around the world. There needs to be a similar movement in the heterosexual world to put an end to normative thinking that moral outrage is the correct response to people who have unconventional lifestyles.
Sex as shame sells newspapers, gets eyeballs on TV shows or online, and it gives people in positions of authority the power to judge and humiliate others for their choices. This is inherently harmful because it diminishes the people who are the subjects of such shaming. It makes them and others like them feel their life choices aren’t valid. There are other insidious effects of sex as shame. It prevents people from talking openly about what they do and don’t like. It stops people sharing sex advice the way they might share a good recipe. It makes people feel uptight, alone and isolated on sexual issues and problems.
Sex isn’t shameful. It is an activity almost everyone on the planet engages in, and we enjoy or endure it to varying degrees. Our enjoyment might increase if people felt able to talk about it openly, to express themselves, be themselves and know that they’re free of judgment for their wants, desires and choices.
The firing of Dr Gow is a regressive step, and other than smutty jokes, and a little awkwardness in campus meetings, it’s hard to see the harm caused by his chosen sexual expression. In fact, the only harm is the moral injury felt by the seemingly uptight board of regents, but as free speech advocates often remind us, there is no right not to be offended. While most people might not be sufficiently brave and open to share their sex lives with the world, Carmen and Joe have done nothing more than invite people to be part of their sexual expression. It seems a shame for a long and successful career to end because some people can’t cope with that level of self-awareness and freedom.
Here at The Sex Guides, we have a simple message. Understand yourself. Be yourself.
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